it is a long road.
<there should be a picture here of a
minotaur looking at a butterfly that landed on it's hand, but i haven't
drawn it yet.. imagine it being here though, okay?>
sometimes i feel like nothing.
(i wanted to say this, but while researching,
i found that someone else said it perfectly so...)
"1/0" is a paradox; in a way that "0/1" is not. Nothing can be divided
by zero. If one approaches the formula from the positive side, it would
appear that the answer is an infinite positive value. If one approaches
the formula from the negative side, the opposite is true. Thus, anything
divided by zero is simultaneously positive and negative infinity. "One
over Zero" is a paradox in another way too, in a way that transcends mere
arithmetic. One is something, and Zero is nothing. The fact that the universe
holds something over nothing, that it prefers to exist, rather than not
exist, is fundamentally absurd. No being can ever come to deserve its own
birth. 1/0 is a cry out against mere logic and efficiency. Stuff
exists. All existence, all truth, cannot be ultimately justified: it can
only be described, explained, and enjoyed.
1/0 is illogical. 1/0 is irrational. 1/0 is impossible. 1/0 is transcendentally
sometimes i feel like all my friendships are
based on something that isn't there. That the only reason people like me
is because of things they misunderstand, and though i haven't lied or misrepresented
myself, things they previously thought of me would be revealed as false,
and the relationship would crumble.
i look around me, a voice says:
"these are not your friends, they are your enemies,
have you forgotten? have you forgotten your job?"
"it is like a dream to me, i can see it but it
is so far away, and then it is gone"
"well catch up to it"
"i can't... i don't know where it's gone"
"so sit here."
"nothing, i don't know, tell me what to do."
"it's not my job"
"do you know what i have to do?"
"give me a hint"
"stop begging, you're above it."
"no i'm not, i'm not above anything, i never
claimed to be"
"you sure act like it sometimes"
"so? it means nothing"
"i don't know, go away"
and i am alone.
Other times, it seems i am alone in a deep dark
pit, with someone at the top yelling down to me as i keep slide farther
and father into the darkness.
"i see things that are so beautiful, so perfect..and
i can never be part of them, never feel them for myself." he said, leaning
against the wall.
"relax."she said, "you don't want to be
part of perfection."
she signed, and for the first time in the presence
of the beast, she became human.
the girl kneeled next to him, and touched his
hand. her skin was smooth and cold to the touch.
"relax" she whispered.
minotaur's eyes squinted.
The unicorn embraced him.
"I do like you." she whispered. "everything is
meaningless. everything is okay.".
"you dont have to worry about your own existance"
she whispered to him.
she looked into his eyes. "you dont have to feel
"i don't know.." he spoke. "i don't know why
i have to be alone."
"don't do that to me," she said, "i can't help
you. You don't need me."
"i don't want you to tell me i'm not alone."
"you are." she replied
"i know." he said.
"i know you know."
hope in hopelessness.
meaning amongst a sea of meaninglessness.
other times, i feel infinite.
GaijinSenshi: there was an earth
GaijinSenshi: the weather has been
GaijinSenshi: i always get in an
odd moodin weather like this.